Gear Weird

Pure security genius

Hey computer industry writers… you want to get geeks interested in your tech article?  Incorporate espionage into your gadget review.   Throwing in a reference to 007 or some other, handsome, non-geek-like, gadget-swinging spy is like rubbing bacon grease on dog treats, it’s really not necessary… but it really gets the dog excited and is a whole lot of fun to watch (there’s nothing more entertaining than nerd drool).

The latest thing that caught my eye was in an eWEEK Labs write up by Cameron Sturdevant of a new Mobile Edge bag:

Bluetooth Bunker Protects Devices
Taking a page from a spy novel, Mobile Edge offers stylish computer carriers with a Wireless Security Shield Pocket.

Gasp!  Spy novels?!?  Tell me more.

Taking a page from a spy novel, Mobile Edge offers stylish computer carriers with a Wireless Security Shield Pocket—made of radio-blocking material that forms a physical firewall between mobile devices and hackers or virus-infected Bluetooth devices—big enough to accommodate a PDA and a small cell phone handset.

My testing at eWEEK Labs proved that no radio signals penetrated the pocket, thus protecting my Bluetooth-enabled devices from possible viral infection just by being in close proximity to a compromised wireless device.

Now, I know what you’re thinking: “My cell phone is small and portable… if I’m going out for the evening I don’t want to carry a briefcase just to protect my valuable cell phone.  There’s no way I’m going to show up on the red carpet at the Oscars carrying a huge bag!”

No worries.  Aditya and I are starting a new business based around our new, hacker-proof shield for your cell phone.  Our “Bluetooth bullet-proof vest” is small enough to fit in your pocket yet packed with enough radio-wave-blocking technology to keep out even the most advanced hackers.  Your new cell phone will be snuggled in, safely protected from all radio signals, ensuring your phone will never get a virus from another infected device.  As an added bonus our new product will also protect you from all the cancer-causing radio waves emitted by your cell phone.  Even if you don’t have a Bluetooth-enabled cell phone the health benefits of the “vest” are worth the investment.  Imagine the feeling of security that will wash over you, knowing that both you and your device are now totally protected from harmful cell phone RF.

Want to be one of the next generation of tech gazillionaires?  Get in on the ground floor with our new company!  Angel investors may submit proof of fiscal liquidity directly (no checks or credit cards please, just send cash in small, unmarked bills).

One reply on “Pure security genius”

[…] I may have ridiculed the idea someone would want to put their cell phone in a briefcase pocket which… (and, presumably, incoming calls) I do have to commend Mobile Edge for spotting a need: laptop bags […]

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