OK, Sun is suing Microsoft. Big deal. Microsoft is small potatoes. The workstation vendor has ten more lawsuits waiting in the wings:

10	Suit against Microsoft: the CD-ROM "Microsoft Cats" infringes on McNealy's ownership of "hair ball" metaphors.

9	God: for creating that sun that is bigger than Sun, the computer company.

8	Sun-Maid Raisins: Sun doesn't make raisins!

7	Novell: gratuitous Java news ticker on home page.

6	McDonalds: for making dangerous Java.

5	Microsoft again: for emotional damage caused by Microsoft having fastest Java Virtual Machine.

4	The moon: unlicensed use of Sun reflective energy.

3	Starbucks: noncompliant Java implementation (doesn't support RMI).

2	Marimba: for making Java look cooler than it actually is.

1	Coppertone: "sunblock" technology is blatant restraint of trade.